Nimious Thoughts

buzzfeed: Raven understood what being a teenager was really...

Fri, 24 May 2013 06:15:12 -0500

Raven understood what being a teenager was really like.

antisociallysplendid: someonesthunderboltsomeday: lsdandthc: s...

Fri, 24 May 2013 06:14:34 -0500

someonesthunderboltsomeday:

lsdandthc:

skittlezthecat:

da-sy:

redvinesgiraffe:

You were on your way home when you died.

It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.

And that’s when you met me.

“What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”

“You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.

“There was a… a truck and it was skidding…”

“Yup,” I said.

“I… I died?”

“Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies,” I said.

You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”

“More or less,” I said.

“Are you god?” You asked.

“Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”

“My kids… my wife,” you said.

“What about them?”

“Will they be all right?”

“That’s what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”

You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”

“Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”

“Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”

“Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right,”

“All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”

You followed along as we strode through the void. “Where are we going?”

“Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”

“So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”

“Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.

“You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”

“How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”

“Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”

“Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”

“Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”

“Where you come from?” You said.

“Oh sure,” I explained “I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh,” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”

“Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”

“So what’s the point of it all?”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”

“Well it’s a reasonable question,” you persisted.

I looked you in the eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”

“You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”

“No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”

“Just me? What about everyone else?”

“There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you and me.”

You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”

“All you. Different incarnations of you.”

“Wait. I’m everyone!?”

“Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.

“I’m every human being who ever lived?”

“Or who will ever live, yes.”

“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”

“And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too,” I added.

“I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.

“And you’re the millions he killed.”

“I’m Jesus?”

“And you’re everyone who followed him.”

You fell silent.

“Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”

You thought for a long time.

“Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”

“Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”

“Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”

“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”

“So the whole universe,” you said, “it’s just…”

“An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”

And I sent you on your way.

O_O

yesss i found it again! one of my all time favourite reads.

Philosophy went to the max right here

OI SCROLL BACK UP AND READ ALL OF IT!

I was really intrigued by this

philosophy went to the max? Philosophy came, shot me in the shoulder and said i was never shot because the gun never existed because I’m not real and the pain I’m actually feeling is the beginning of the big bang theory in another time zone

homleschapel: summer is real cute until every fuckin type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of...

Fri, 24 May 2013 06:14:17 -0500

homleschapel:

summer is real cute until every fuckin type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of hell

i-am-fangirl-hear-me-squeal: shavingryansprivates: striderstesticle: shavingryansprivates: crying...

Fri, 24 May 2013 06:13:38 -0500

i-am-fangirl-hear-me-squeal:

shavingryansprivates:

striderstesticle:

shavingryansprivates:

crying is manly as shit

crying was originally seen as a masculine thing. if you were a roman centurion or something and you didn’t cry when one of your fellow soldiers died, you were seen as an insensitive pussy.

told u

Mads in Cannes, May 2012

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:20:24 -0500

Mads in Cannes, May 2012

"One time I went shopping for shirts and suits, but then I found the most beautiful pair of socks and..."

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:18:06 -0500

“One time I went shopping for shirts and suits, but then I found the most beautiful pair of socks and I thought, “I just have to buy this”. So when I did, and I was at the counter, the cashier told me, “You can get another pair of socks for a half off since we’re having a special sale.” So I did, I went and got another pair of socks and then they told me, this time, that if I buy another pair of socks, I’ll get another pair of socks for free…And so I bought another socks to get another pair of socks for free and they told me again that if I buy another pair of socks, this time, they’ll let me have two pairs of socks for free. And I did. So by the end of the day, I had bought about 7 pairs of socks and no new suits or shirts. And I thought to myself, “This is my life now. Spending money on socks.””

- Benedict Cumberbatch, excerpt from Neigh magazine (via galifianafuck)

#oh my god #I am laughing so hard #I’m reading this thinking there was going to be some meaningful expression about society at the end#but no #it’s just the life and times of benny’s socks (via theblueboxonbakerstreet)

okAY I LOVE ALL OF YOU BUT THIS IS A JOKE

MY FRIENDS LIKE BULLSHITTING B-CUMBZ QUOTES AND THEY’RE REALLY GOOD AT IT

HE NEVER SAID THIS

IT SAYS “excerpt from Neigh magazine” GUYS C’MON
(via strangersatthemall)

paigefillyr: hiddleswiggles: sir-genwaldthuswindburn: loki-can...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:17:34 -0500

paigefillyr:

hiddleswiggles:

sir-genwaldthuswindburn:

loki-cant-sing:

remmylupinlover:

hobbitsunite:

Home made cosplay of the Iron Man Mark 7 suit shown off at animeland wasabi 2012

I don’t usually reblog stuff about Iron Man…but when I do…it’s the coolest shit.

COSPLAY THINGS THAT ARE JUST NOT FUCKING FAIR

take all my money and make this for me

I don’t think the studio has functioning one like this.

The studio would have a grey suit with a bunch of green balls attached to it and a program that layers a CGI suit on to those points.

Meaning this is the RADDEST SHIT YOU WILL EVER SEE.

Photo

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:17:04 -0500

frosty-butt: nudityandnerdery: dianariggslegs: Steve Rogers...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:15:24 -0500

frosty-butt:

nudityandnerdery:

dianariggslegs:

Steve Rogers is not afraid of strong women.

Steve Rogers is not afraid of strong women.

Stop it with the fic where Steve is terrified of Natasha, or Maria, or Pepper, or guh, Darcy. I guess people think it’s cute, or whatever.

Seriously. Strong women don’t make Steve scared, they make him swoon.

The only thing Steve is afraid of is that strong women won’t like him.

Acting like Steve is afraid of women also ignores one of my favorite moments of the movies, where Steve isn’t sure if Clint can be trusted, but he looks to Natasha and it just takes one nod from her for Steve to be okay with it. He respects people who know what they’re doing, male or female.

Captain feminism

gastrogirl: frozen brownie sundae.

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:14:03 -0500

gastrogirl:

frozen brownie sundae.

princekarkat: for some reason i thought both of these were the...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:13:53 -0500

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

baracks-wife: benedictatorship: buzzfeed: Benedict...

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:13:33 -0500

baracks-wife:

benedictatorship:

buzzfeed:

Benedict Cumberbatch is actually just an awesome goofball.

-On Tumblr Fanfic

caosmosi: this is so amazing

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:12:12 -0500

caosmosi:

this is so amazing

Photo

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:08:34 -0500

anaeolist: cute was inwented in russia

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:04:09 -0500

anaeolist:

cute was inwented in russia

Photo

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:03:03 -0500

Photo

Thu, 23 May 2013 16:01:26 -0500

while watching animated movies at age 2: hell yeah motherfucker

Thu, 23 May 2013 15:58:55 -0500

while watching animated movies at age 2: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 12: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 20: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 200: hell yeah motherfucker

colethewolf: reborn-gp: sparkstilinski: linden ashby is dylan...

Thu, 23 May 2013 15:57:43 -0500

colethewolf:

reborn-gp:

sparkstilinski:

linden ashby is dylan o’brien’s biggest fan (✿◠‿◠)

I think everybody is Dylan’s biggest fan. damn. love that dude.

theblacklacedandy: funnywildlife: Award Winning Garden Design...

Thu, 23 May 2013 15:56:15 -0500

theblacklacedandy:

funnywildlife:

Award Winning Garden Design By Ben Hoyle

I’M SCREAMING THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL